My uncle won't be leaving town til tonight and the family has been here cleaning out the house. I don't know if it was 2 or 3 loads in my cousins man's huge trailer. My brother is coming to get scrap metal today sometime.

Since my bed was shot it was decided that I could have grandpa's bed. They just bought it for him like 6 months or so ago. So last night was my first night in my "new" bed. Grandpa didn't sleep under the comforter. He slept on a blanket on top of it with another blanket over him. I put my blanket on top of the comforter and slept under that.

For awhile when I laid down last night, I just laid in Grandpa's smell. I need to get a new tote of some kind and take Grandpa's pillow case and put it in there and throw in a shirt if I can find one that's been worn and not washed.

It's only been a week and I just want the people to go away so I can just be. It's not going to happen because they are pushing fast to get the house ready to put on the market. Yay! And I have to get my ass in gear and apply for every little job I can apply for. Even if I have to work 2 part time jobs to make full time pay.

Because guess what else? I'm now house hunting. I always knew I wasn't getting this house. That has never been an issue for me, but my friends really think I should get the house. So mom has this plan and it's a good plan. But it involves going to lots of open houses.

Found one yesterday that I liked. Except when you walked in the door you were assaulted by dog smell. People with dogs never know how bad their homes really do smell. You can bathe your dog all you want, perfume it up...but it's still going to smell like what it is...DOG. I wouldn't mind the house. Fenced yard, nice cement patio, 2 stall garage...and only 19,000 over what we're looking at lol...it's nice to dream lol.

Looked at another one and the listing sounded good. Then we found the place. Oooook the location was jacked. It ends at another persons drive and is stuck behind that other house. Yea not so fond of that one.

Then there was the one that the only thing good about it was the steps. All the steps were good and solid. The house was in front of a cemetary. No big deal. But when you went inside this place omg the creep factor was HUGE. My cousin who went with us said she stopped inside the door it creeped her out too.

Joy o Joy...more time with my mom, more time stressing, and the job market around here sucks ass on a major level! So the rush is on and I'm still waiting for things to feel real again.