Friday Night

So technically its saturday morning lol but when I started drinking it was Friday night lol. My cheap ass wine was on sale today and my mommy bought some for me lol. I drank 97% of the bottle the other 3% my friend drank. Ok so maybe I drank 99% of it lol. But that happens lol.

And as usually happens when you drink you get sentimental and you get real with yourself. I love that man. I am glad I foun him. Im glad that he wants me and my kid.

Yup Im a bit fucked up but i didnt drunk dial him lol or drunk text him lol. He will be here tomorrow and all will be right in our world for a couple days.

Brenda....thank you for your comments. Its hard to be happy and going with the happy I have had to make a couple decisions that I kinda hate.

Ive decided that I should probably in the best interest of this new relationship drop a couple friendships that I have had for years. Not because I dont like them anymore but because they will try to ruin my happiness. I really like this guy and not being friends with these two people anymore doesnt break my heart. It hurts that I cant be friends with them because they wont like my happiness but i like my happiness and Im not going to jeopordize it.

Its really really scary what im going through and as much as i dont want to fuck it up Im doing everything in my power to fuck it up lol. I figure if he wants to leave do it sooner rather than later because that way im the only one who is hurt.

We are addicted to each other. He's addicted to me and Mae and Mae and I are addicted to him. Soon we will find ourselves spending a few days together in his place just us. Im afraid we wont want to leave.

Sooo lol my drunk ass is going to go to bed and hopefully dream of all the possibilities that could be.

Sigh.....why must i be a girl lol