Life happens! For me it always happens in great big giant waves that suck me under into a cloud of depression where I do what I have to do and once the kid is in bed play a lot of bejeweled and farmville. I have been meaning to leave comments on other people's blogs but seriously lol I just can not bring myself to do it lol.

That's the depression lol. Thanks Brenda for asking how I was. I have been meaning to blog about what's up in the land of insanity; but it's been insane and I just really didn't want to blog it because it would take time away from pogo, bejeweled, and farmville. Depression city I tell you lol. That or it's escape. It's a little bit of both. Life happens and happens by the bucketful.

Let's see lol worked with bitch at work Monday night. That was so super fun I just want to do it every single solitary time I have to work! Don't talk to me all fucking night; act like I'm not there, until I start doing things. Then only to tell me you aren't doing anything til such and such time. Fine I don't give a fuck lol. Then THEN after the story happened that I havn't blogged about happened she chose that day to bitch about welfare mama's and foodstamps.

I am so damned sorry that so many stupid people are on welfare. I am sorry that they don't know how to add and subtract and find out how many stamps they got on their card. I'm sorry that them not doing that makes extra work for you; which by the way you are getting paid to do! I am sorry that the 1st, 9th, and 15th( i think those are the days the cards load with stamps) are busy for you at WalMart but you have been there for how freaking long you should be used to that time of the month being nuts!

Do not stand next to me and bitch about it and then tell me not to take it personal when I inform you and the customer of when food stamps come out because I'm a welfare mama too! I don't have to work next week with her and I told my boss thank you today and told him I'd appreciate it if he could do that as often as possible and why. I don't want to work in a hostile environment; it's hostile enough as it is. All of us fucking drama queens who work there lol.

Tuesday my friend who needs money worse than I need money had to stay home because her daughter was sick. I had some serious heartburn. I took some tums for it and promptly threw them up. I had heartburn so bad I told my friend bring the girl here, take my car, work my shift, and we're good lol. She was all up for it. I had heartburn from the moment I woke up to the moment I went to bed. I burped all day and it truly sucked! Not only did I miss a day of work, I didn't feel good on top of it.

Lucky for me Sid is a good girl and she was on the mend from being sick. Her and I had a nice lil sick day together. I had her all set up in Mae's room with her feet propped up and a blanket. Then she came out with me in the living room. So that day wasn't horrific that day is coming up.

Wednesday was quiet except for having to go and give my mom money and pay the water bill. The money is flying right out the door and thank god tax time is coming up because I have about $900 bucks in bills to pay off and then hand the rest over to my mom for bills. I'm going to buy myself a nice lil treat but that will be all. Nothing fun this year except my treat lol.

I went to bed early that night. I had to work Thursday from 11 to 5 and I decided to get some rest. The horror began, unbeknownst to me, somewhere between 11pm Wednesday and Midnight Thursday morning.

I sleep with my door open if it's just me and Mae. I thought I was getting up because I needed to go potty lol, turns out I had to do that too but it was the bathroom light shining that woke me up. I get up, no glasses, and there is Mae with the hair gel! WTF!?!?! That's never good. So I smack her ass and send her back to bed. NEVER paying any attention to anything but peeing and the gel.

The next morning comes and I wake up before the alarm, do all my net stuff I like to do in the morning, got in the shower, and then it went downhill from there! I finished my shower and yelled at Mae to come get in the shower so we could get her to school.

I didn't have my glasses on again and all I could see was this horrible dark maroon stain on my child. On her legs, her face, her arms. There were scratches and blotches and what looked like a rash.

I FREAKED THE FUCK OUT in a big way. I am so horrible about the house being clean and knowing when my mom is coming over that way I can get the "mess" picked up(which really is usually blankets on the floor and dishes in the sink lol woohhoo) well I called her, not knowing what time it was. Asking her if she was at work yet and SHE NEEDED TO COME OVER NOW NOW NOW!!

By the time she got there I figured out that it was lipstick. I had gotten some of it off her face. But the rest of her body you could see a rash, scratches,blotches things that aren't normal. And then I saw her bed! Her brand new mattress that I think is better than mine is now covered in lipstick. I have stain remover that I am going to be using AFTER church tomorrow lol.

We made a trip to the Emergency Room and I had a fun time of telling them about her adhd and pica and what she did and what i did or didn't know she had gotten into. And for a moment I wanted to just smack the shit out of the nurses and doctor. It was like listening to my Grandpa tell me She's just a little baby; when they told me to lock everything up. WTF do you think I have been doing. One freaking time I missed getting a lipstick put away. For christs sake my makeup bag is in the bathroom closet on the high shelf WITH the cleaning products! You think I just met this child?!?! Oh and then; AND THEN! when we got home and my friend was over I found the empty bottle of this stuff I bought for her to not bite her nails! I don't know if she drank it or tried to because it was empty and there was this nice hard spot on the mattress where it dried. I think she may have tried to but when it tasted bad she didn't drink more. I still didn't spank her! Talked about how she could have gotten really hurt. Oh and terrifed look she had for awhile was because I yelled at her, mom yelled at her, and her Aunt yelled at her....i think she was waiting for the beating myself and not getting one is confusing her lol.

So another day without work. I did not kill her. She is still breathing. If you require proof of life please send a paper from your home to mine and I'll take the picture lol. But I didn't kill her. I yelled a little bit but not screaming at her you know that hysterical yell we have? yea that one. I didn't spank her. She is now sleeping on a crib mattress on the floor. I'm not as mean as my friend and my mom who said to put her on the floor lol i'm mad but i cant do that to her lol. She can only watch what I want to watch on tv. She has to be in the living room at pretty much all times. I am nice and have been putting family shows on, not the shows she wants to watch but shows we can both watch. She is not a very happy girl. Though she has lost that terrified look she had on her face for about 18 hours lol.

Friday was a good day because she doesn't have to have tubes put in her ears. One is still there and the other is gunky and on our next visit if it hasn't fallen out we will have surgery to remove a tube instead of put one in lol.

Today...ahh sweet today you are almost over lol. I worked this morning and my mom and dad took Mae so my friend could go out of town. Picked up pizza for supper and Mae is in bed and I'm soon to follow. Church tomorrow and I have a lot of praying to do lol.

Because Monday my mom and dad will be living here monday through Friday lol. They will go home on Friday night and come back Monday night lol. And the cats they just got are coming with. And I have to be one of the people scooping the litter. And there is a ton of stress about to happen. Which makes my anxiety go up, which makes my xanex intake go up lol. My dad though got a new job up here and hey let the games begin. Oh yea did I mention that I have to figure out what to do with my share of the inheritance without fucking myself with the government lol. Oh yea and I REALLY REALLY need to find a new job because this house is too little for all of us I'm thinking. And between last night and tonight I've broken and chipped like 4 nails lol. It's been a hell of a week, I'm really hoping that next week is better lol.

May God please forgive me at church tomorrow when I have nothing for the offering plate because I really needed smokes and gas in the car to get to church tomorrow! And that my friends is a week in the life of...if showing the pictures wouldn't get me in trouble lol I'd show you how pretty Mae looked with her big red stained legs and arms!