Have I mentioned at all that he's a real man? Doesn't hit, doesn't scream, doesn't go ballistic and then comes over so we can talk and try to figure things out. Work things out. Get things back on track. Though I know some people have reading comprehension problems, to those I say go back and get your education.
He came over tonight and we talked, cuddled on the couch, talked about other stuff, untangled a necklace and went over my schedule and found out that with WM we will be able to actually plan things.
I broke the no sex rule lol but that was only after a lot of hugging, couple hours of snuggling on the couch and while trying to say good bye lol we did lots of huggin n kissin lol.
He wasn't going to cuz it would make me feel bad cuz of some other issues we had talked about. Told him this was the exception...make up sex! I have never had make up sex that didn't result from physical violence. And let me tell you what! It was some good fucking sex!
We figured out that it was both our faults for the way I have been feeling and what is actually going on with us. We want to be together. When we are together we dont argue or fight. It's when we go days and weeks without physcially laying eyes on each other that it goes craptastic.
But get us together and we're all good. Hell not only did I miss him Mae missed him. She got up when she heard him and wanted to hug and kiss him. He is doing a good job with her and she got her hug and kiss.
We went over my schedule and we figured out when to see each other, what possible days he can stay over and he may actually get talked to at work because of all the overtime he put in that wasn't approved. I told him I get that you cant pass up 20 bucks n hour but seriously dont answer the phone lol.
The best part of him coming over was being on the couch. Watching tv curled all up on him and just being together. I told him this is what we have to do even if we have to do it with my mom and watch tv. I promised no bridezillas lol.
He loves me, i love him...but i dont know how to make things work when there isnt the threat of physical violence.
I knew he was different when I met him...wish i could quickly get over my issues so we can just enjoy what we have. We went a little overboard with the sex when it first started happening and i let it happen. now we know what we have to do and what we have as expectations.
Can you belive i was going to let a real man, a good man slip through my fingers because I'm not used to being with a real man! Someone slap me...ooo wait he already pulled my hair and gave me sex hair lol i think that counts.
This blog brought to you by the night time meds that make me sleepy and loopy lol...good thing they dont kick in right away lol or makeup sex would have been delayed if it even got off the ground! Did I mention he was hesitant cuz he didn't want me to feel bad...thats a good man!
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Aren't you glad you made yourself wait until Wednesday?!?!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad he came through and made time for you. That's one of the hardest things with a new budding relationship, making time when there are so many other outside influences. I'm sure ya'll will get it worked out, with your new job schedule and Mae starting school again real soon.
Hugss to you!
I'm with Brenda. I was hoping you wouldn't push the self-destruct button. *smiles*
ReplyDeleteYou deserve the happy & I'm still sending you all my saved up good karma for your house hunting. On top of everything else, I also feel special because your butt dialed my phone. ;)
Hey there **smiles**
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to read you didn't self-sabotage. I know sometimes things seem to good to be true.
I understand abuse on so many levels as I'm not only a survivor but because of the healing Jesus has done with my heart and mind.
Like a cassette tape, the tapes from abuse don't always seem to completely erase either. So, I learned with God's help the old tapes have been recorded over.
Today, I understand I can love myself and am worthy, no matter what anyone else says or has said.
Sounds like you have a really terrific man. I'm with dawn, I'm happy for you that you didn't hit the self-destruct button **smiles**
You are a woman of dignity and worth, who deserves a better way of life!!!
((HUGS))
kathleen {SG}