Most times i think im not happy with what ive got so i invent things to make it bad. I think im getting tired of only doing the weekend thing with John. I mean i like having someone around, but now im doubting my ability to be in any form of relationship.

I think ive gotten past the lets be slow stage and now im ready to kick it up a notch or twenty. The big problem is we both live at home. While i was deathly afraid of him getting this apartment, i wish now he had! I think its time for us to do things at houses and to be perfectly honest, like my mom says, grandpas furniture isnt comfortable. Besides being almost as old as me lol i dont know how John and his 6' 3'' frame could deal with tryin to get in and out of the couch lol.

We were invited next weekend to go swimming. I really hope the weather turns at least another 15 degrees warmer and the rain stops. Otherwise we wont be able to go swimming. Maybe i should suggest an alternative, but hell i dont know what to suggest.

The whole not having an income thing really sucks when it comes to this dating thing. I have always been the one to go above and beyond what i have to offer(thats my good friends opinion) and i hate doing things that cost money! Maybe i can see about moving the very uncomfortable couch around in the living room. Thats work but hell i dont know!

Todays date has us going to the farmers market to say hi to his mom and then its off for lunch with my family for mothers day.

Not a big date day but it will do.