It was a lovely night at work! It started with a phone call asking if i was running late. Um no, its only 4. Yeaaa i was scheduled at 4 and I wrote down 5! Not good!

Then the girl who got off at 4 and I both thought the other was pissed. She figured out before I got there that I was irritated with Mae. When I realized I was late I hopped up and grabbed my shoes. Well Mae decided that this would be the best time to throw herself at me and my legs. Seriously, not a good thing. So I grouched at Mae while throwing our gear together.

Got to work and was like I am soo sorry! Here look at my schedule that I wrote down. I really thought I was in at 5. The girl wasn't mad at me, she just thought i was irritated and she was the one who should be irritated. You know how it is.

Then the person I worked with tonight, we had an issue. The issue was not mine! I was as accomodating as I could be. I wasn't upset, and I tried to explain it to her like she was 3, but I don't think she got it til we were at our cars.

I finally told her You're not used to people accomodating you and it not being an issue are you? She said no she wasn't.

Here's the deal at work. We have to clean the lobby, bathrooms, break down a hot and cold table, wrap meat, and clean a slicer. That includes sweeping, mopping, changing and taking out the garbages. Even a round with the vaccum cleaner.

Well the woman I worked with tonight is one of the women at work that they always have an issue with. She's the one who the first day I worked with her introduced herself as the bitch. Well tonight she felt like, and I'm assuming it's also from the last night she worked, she was doing all the hard labor.

I swept the bathrooms, half of the lobby, filled condiments, cleaned the sneezeguard, cleaned the reach in, started the dishes, broke down the cold table, cleaned the cold table, put the table back together, put the toppings away, tore the slicer down, washed the slicer, swept our work area twice, mopped the work area, wiped out the bottom of the reach in, wrapped the meat, cleaned the microwave,locked the walk in, turned off lights, and ordered the bread.

She squirted cleaner in the toilets, ran the vaccum over 3 black rugs, swept half the lobby, mopped the lobby, tore some paper and changed that, wiped down the tables, changed and took out the garbage, wiped down the garbage can lids, and then came over and took over the dishes from me, broke down the hot table, put hot food in the reach in, cleaned the slicer, counted money, and turned off a light.

I don't know about you, BUT that seems like a pretty equal division of the labor. It is not my fault that whoever she worked with before had her do all of it, or whatever she feels she did. The problem is that she likes to do it HER way. Deviating from her routine really puts her off and puts her in a crabby mood.

I have no problem doing it the way she wants to do it. The way she wants to do it is the way it was when I first started working with her. I did all the lobby and then came back to help tear apart the cold/hot tables and clean those as she did dishes. It's no big deal to me how we do it, as long as we do it and are out of there before 10:15 pm.

My telling her that we could do it that way next time really irritated her too. I was like I'm offering to do it your way. That set it off to it's not about doing it my way, blah blah blah!

Seriously...You are getting your way. Your getting your way and noone is bitching. Your getting your way and it was the easiest and simplest. She just couldn't accept it. I have no idea why. Though I know that come Thursday we will be doing it her way.

It's a real good thing that I can get along with pretty much anyone. It's also a pretty good thing that everyone who knows me knows that eventually I will say something if you take advantage of my good nature. So if I say it's no big deal, it's not a problem; that's what I mean. Trust that I know how to say No when I need to!

Here's to 3 more days of work and a hell of a paycheck!

I really should just blog once on Sunday about the jackass. The reason I don't though is because if I get rid of it right away, then it's not a problem for the rest of the day. Blog to vent and vent to not go crazy! Oh, and as you've probably figured out, Yes, it is another rant about the jackass.

As you will recall I blogged about how Mae had successfully shed 2 pounds, or maybe I didn't. Got her to within a pound of that weight loss from the gain at her dad's. (Yes, I'm going to say mean things in a minute, just wait for it.) She came home from her dad's today. We went for lunch at Mama Nick's, shopped at Wal-Mart, then stopped at the video store. After bringing in everything, taking of the medicine, going to the potty, and getting out of winter clothes...I stuck Mae on the scale.

Before I tell you the number let's remember something from me sending her to him last weekend. He emailed me to see if she was coming. I sent him an email back. One of the things that I put into that email was the fact that she lost 2 lbs and please do not over feed her. I actually put that in the email because I didn't want her overfed to where she was gaining weight.

Remember then that she came back home back up to almost 53 lbs from the 49lbs she was when she left my home. Let's remember that she has been known to be fed 15 pizza rolls, AT A TIME!

I have modified her food intake. I listen to her whine if she wants more and I say no. I also have heard her instead of whine ask for fruit instead. It's a battle, and it's one I shouldn't have to fight alone.

51lbs and a couple ounces! OMG!! I was ecstatic! She didn't gain anything that she wasnt supposed to! I weighed her before she left Friday. She was 50.8 lbs, I wasn't able to get her back to 49 but I was close! Moments after a small happy dance, anger set in. Set in with a quickness.

If he was able to do it this weekend, why didn't he do it last weekend. Why did he sabotoge his daughter? Because her gaining weight doesn't effect me, it effects her. It doesn't hurt me, it hurts her! Why is he like that? What part of don't over feed her wasn't comprehended last week but was this one?

The bastard used to be a freaking fat ass like me! I saw the pictures. I know how hard it is to lose weight, and he definitly knows. So why wouldn't you just go along with the plan of action for your child. Why make something that is already hard, harder?

The holidays are the worst time to try to maintain your weight. All the eating that goes on, and all the really good food that is pulled out. I'm just trying to maintain her weight so she can enjoy the holiday food, in moderation!

It's very very frustrating! I'm beyond anger to just plain frustration! I don't understand, and I'm pretty sure I never will!

So I will just be thankful that this week we aren't working on losing added weight. Just working on the normal.

Heres to surviving the holiday onlsaught of good, yummy food!

The worst part of Sunday is having to deal with the jackass! The one lesson he never learned was that to be in Control you have to first be able to control yourself. Along with that is knowing that you cant control everything and that there are some things you dont get to control.

This stupid game he plays is all about control and manipulation. I am not his girlfriend. I am not his ---. All i am is the baby mama! I dont get involved in his life. I dont know anything about what is going on in his world. I dont contact him needlessly. If i do contact it him its because i have to. Never do i want to contact him.

The new rule i have to live by is if i call 3 times and there is no answer is to call the police for a well check. As a person who has threatened to not let me pick my child up on Sunday you do not have the luxury of not answering the phone. Bottom line you have blown your trust and you do not have that luxury.

I am doing my best, MY BEST, to just deal with the fact she has to go there. BUT that doesnt mean she stops being my responsibility. That means you answer the damn phone when it rings.

Manipulation and control...is it really worth all the aggravation it puts you through? Im not playing his game. Im not. There are legal recourses that i can use if i fear for my daughters safety while at his home. And one of those is sending the police to check up on them and make sure everything is ok.

I think i should just dedicate my blog on Sunday's to the jackass. Its the one day of the week that he actually gets some air play for sure in my life.

One day, ooo One glorious day...he will be excised from our lives. I cant wait for that day. I dream of all the sundays that i dont have to deal with the manipulation and attempts at control.

heres to enjoying our sundays!

Greaaaaaaaat! My credit card payment is late. That means instead of 15 dollars i have to pay almost 40 dollars. Though the way im looking at it, i think that i will end up oweing more than the 40 dollars, because not only is the payment late, the late fee put me over my credit limit. Great scam they have going there lol. Come on February so i can pay it off again and cut that bitch up.

Its way to tempting to have 300 bucks just laying around on a card. I always forget about the having to pay back when its burning a hole in my wallet. So the time has come to cancel and cut lol. Ok so maybe just send that lil bitch back to my dads wallet. He wont give it to me unless there is a legit reason. And next time ill give it back to him after ive used it for what i needed!

Do you think i can get my boss to pay for my late charges on my bill. My check was 6 hours short this week. I had bills to pay and i had to pick which to pay. Obviously i had to take the cc hit because there were actual people depending on my paying them what was owed. Greaaat more money gone lol.

Though its not so horrible because i ended up with 4 shifts next week at work. So that means ill have some kind of money for Christmas. I did buy Mae those skates last night. I dont think they will last all that long, but for 20 bucks...whatever we get is good.

Tried to do movie night with the guys last night. I fucked up and brought Harry Potter. Harry is more of a girls movie lol. I need to remember blood, guts, comedy...something but not that lol.

Was an early night and im not sure when im getting Mae yet. But not for a few more hours. Think ill just chill and be. Maybe we will go for lunch today, not sure. Now im just babbling about nothing lol.

First, Dawn whatever you need. If there's anything I can do, just let me know! Now back to me, because you know im so selfish and bitchy like that!

Woooo its Saturday! I only have to make it til 5 o'clock! Then my weekend begins! I've actually got plans made. Made them earlier in the week. That was a fun phone call lol. My guys don't tend to make long distance plans. I was taking a chance when I called him earlier this week.

We are all so freaking broke its unreal. Yes thanks to generous donations from our faithful friday friends we still have a good time. This time though, I was good. Came home after work, after trying to go out lol. Today we are doing movie night.

We discussed this a few weeks ago because we are all to broke to go sit at the bar. While we love sitting at the bar, truth is, it's far cheaper to have a few drinks at home. Also it helps that a roommate has a ton of music, theres a dart board, and we all know how to visit other places lol.

Well I wanted to see Harry Potter and I thought I'll rent it and we can watch it. Well turns out for the amount of days i would be renting it for, thats like almost 12 bucks. Um...if I'm going to spend 12 bucks, I think I should just go out and buy it. Well mom and dad bought a blu ray player over Thanksgiving. Ahahahaha lets get someone to go in on just buying the movie. The movie is 20 bucks and it comes with the blu ray and a regular dvd. Mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom!!! Yay mom is paying for half. Wooo saving money all over the place! And we can watch it at Christmas!

Since i work right next door to the pizza place, ill be picking up dinner and a movie. Along with Mae's christmas present. They better still have them lol or i will be livid! First my check was late so i couldnt get it and then sold out...grrr lets hope not lol.

Hope everyone has a great Saturday. I'm off to slice the meat n cheese. Plus i get to work with my girl K!!! Yayyy!!!

Heres to a stress free day beer filled night!

You all know i gripe and complain about Mae, alot some days. The other thing I know you know is that I love her something fierce.

When Friday comes around I'm ready to drop her at her dads and get the heck out of dodge. Tonight however, I felt an emotion I hadn't felt in a long time. Sadness! WTF...where did that one come from?

I didn't want to drop her off. I wanted to keep her home and keep her close. That feeling of elation about being single and free didn't happen. Hell I couldn't even bring myself to hit the town with the guys.

I think this week, while very very trying, made me realize that Mae is MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE!! She is my responsibility. She is my life. She is my love. She is everything and beyond.

Just because I get the weekends to be wild woman Heather, in the back of my mind...I am always MaeMae's mama!

*Sigh* She will be back in a day and a half. I will survive to bitch and moan again.

I just thought I would share that I miss my kiddo and for some odd reason...Im feeling lost without her being in the next room.

Heres to tomorrow...another day closer, and hopefully a good night in tips!

Currently I'm cursing my leg, watching Survivor, thanking god that Mae is now in bed!! It's been a long two days. I love that she goes to school. That's a few hours where I don't have to entertain her little butt.

I was able to get out of the house for a minute today. Though when I came back you would have thought I was gone for days, not the 45 minutes or so that was the reality. She was up my butt worse then the flying monkeys that can come out of it.

While I was trying not to strangle her, we ended up having some quality time together. I was laying on the couch with my leg up and I had her come lay up there with me. We played some stupid cheek game, that made her laugh.

We cuddled and joked. God I live for those moments. Just when I thought I was going to lose it, out popped sweet Mae.

Though an hour later, it was time to put her butt to bed! She had no nap today and you could see that she needed to be in her bed, chilled and snoozing.

I'm going to enjoy tv for awhile and then hopefully sleep like a baby.

Here's to not wrecking my ankle/leg any worse this weekend!